Medical Slang Acronyms

Alphabetical Listing of Medical Slang Acronyms

• 10TH FT — 10th Floor Transfer – Dying (floor Number Is Always The Next Number On From The Highest Floor In The Hospital).
• 3H — “Enema That Is “”high, Hot, And A Hell of A Lot.”” Reputedly Given To Patients Who Give Staff A Hard Time.”
• 3PS — Pill, Permissiveness And Promiscuity (relates To Female Patients With Sexually Transmitted Disease)
• 404 — 404 Moment. On Card Rounds – When A Patient’s Medical Records Cannot Be Located (from Internet Error Message: 404 Page Not Found)
• 45C — Patient Is One Chromosome Short of A Full Set (questionable IQ)
• 4F — Fair, Fat, Female And Forty OR Fat, Forty-ish, Flatulent Female (both Mean Abdominal Pain Patient Who Is Candidate For Gall Bladder Disease)
• 4H — (US) Haemophiliac, Hispanic, Homosexual, Heroin Addict
• 5-H-1-T — Polite Medical Term For Shit
• ADR — Ain’t Doing Right
• AE — Aggressive Euthanasia – A Procedure That Obnoxious Patients Would Benefit From.
• AFUBR — All Fucked Up & Beyond Repair
• AGA — Acute Gravity Attack (fell Over)
• AGMI — Ain’t Gonna Make It (won’t Survive)
• AHF — Acute Hissy Fit
• ALC — A La Casa (send The Patient Home)
• ALP — Acute Lead Poisoning – Gunshot Wound
• ALP185 — Acute Lead Poisoning, 185 Grain Injection – 9mm Gunshot Wound
• ALP240 — Acute Lead Poisoning, 240 Grain Injection 44 Calibre Magnum Wound
• ALPAC — Acute Lead Poisoning Air-conditioned – Multiple Gun Shot Wounds
• ALS — Absolute Loss of Sanity (nutcase)
• AMYOYO — Alright Motherfucker, You’re On Your Own (seen In Head Injury Patients In Intensive Care)
• AOB — Alcohol On Board
• APD — Acute Prozac Deficiency (depression)
• APRS — (US) Acute Puerto Rican Syndrome (bouts of Screaming And Yelling)
• APTFRAN — Apply Pillow To Face, Repeat As Necessary (for Annoying Patient)
• AQP — Assuming The Q Position: Deteriorating Or Dying With Tongue Hanging Out
• AQR — Ain’t Quite Right
• ART — Approaching Room Temperature (dead)
• AST — Assuming Seasonal Temperature (dead)
• ATD — (US) Acute Tylenol Deficiency (simple Fever Or Head Cold)
• ATFO — Asked To Fuck Off
• ATL — (Scotland) Aff (off) The Legs; Meaning Unable To Walk
• ATS — Acute Thespian Syndrome: Faking Illness; Known In US As MGM Syndrome
• AWTB — Away With The Birds; A Patient Who Is Totally Confused
• AWTF — Away With The Fairies; A Patient Who Is Totally Confused
• B&T — Bagged And Tagged – Body Ready For Dispatch To Morgue
• B-52 — Combined 5mg of Haldol IV + 2mg of Ativan IV
• BBB — Blood-Brain Barrier – Surgical Drapes
• BBCS — Bumps, Bruises, Cuts And Scrapes (i.e. No Serious Injuries)
• BBLS — Belly-button Lint Sign – Male, Middle-aged, Overweight And Hairy (an Umbilicus That Looks Like The Lint (fluff) Trap In A Tumble Dryer Is Most Common In Overweight, Hairy, Older Men). Known As Belly-Button Fluff Sign In The UK.
• BFF — Big, Fat Faker
• BFH — Brat From Hell (usually Accompanied By PFH – Parent(s) From Hell)
• BFH — “Big Fucking Head; Hydrocephalus As In A “”FLK With A BFH”” (can Be Metaphorical For Arrogant Consultant)”
• BIT — Burp In Transit (gas Seen In The Stomach On An Abdominal Film)
• BMT — Bowel-Movement Taco (faecal Matter Trapped In Female Genitalia)
• BMW — Bitch Moan & Whine
• BOHICA — Bend Over, Here It Comes Again
• BSS — Bilateral Samsonite Syndrome: Patient Admitted With Both Their Bags Packed In Preparation
• BTH — Bury The Hatchet – Accidently Leave A Surgical Instrument Inside A Patient.
• BTSOOM — Beats The Shit Out of Me
• BUNDY — But Unfortunately Not Dead Yet
• BVA — Breathing Valuable Air
• BWCO — Baby Won’t Come Out (needs Caesarian)
• C&T WARD — “Coma Ward – “”cabbages And Turnips”””
• C/C — Cancel Christmas (dead)
• C2 — “A “”can’t C**t””; Lazy Physician Who Passes Off Work To Colleagues And Often Whines”
• CABG — Coronary Artery Bypass Graft (Cabbage) – Heart Bypass
• CAT6 — Triage Is Cat 1 (major) To Cat 5 (minor) So Cat 6 Means A Timewaster
• CATS — Cut All To Shit
• CBT — Chronic Burger/Biscuit Toxicity (obesity)
• CCFCCP — Coo-coo For Co-Co Puffs (dementia Or Similar)
• CF — Cockroach Factor – A Patient’s Ability To Survive Trauma Or Serious Treatment Is Inversely Proportional To His Contribution To Society.
• CFD — Call For Dirt (severely Ill Or Dying)
• CFT — Chronic Food Toxicity I.e. Obesity
• CFU — Complete(ly) F*ck(ed) Up
• CHAOS — Chronic Hurts All Over Syndrome (PTSD/Fibromyalgia, Etc.)
• CHIBLOC — Closed Head Injury, Brief Loss of Consciousness
• CIA — Chrome Induced Ischaemia – Patient That Develops Inexplicable Chest Pains When Arrested And Handcuffed
• CKS — Cute Kid Syndrome
• CLL — Chronic Low Life
• CLOMI — Cat Like Observation And Masterful Inactivity (patient Under Observation)
• COPD — Chronic Old Persons Disease (unwell, No Specific Cause)
• COSMONAUT — “Cat Owner, Smells, Made of Nuts And Used Tampons (“”mad Cat Lady”” With Poor Hygiene And Body Odour)”
• CPM — Calcified Penisitis Morbidium – Male Patient Whose Ailment Is Due To Excessive Or Unprotected Sex
• CRAFT — Can’t Remember A Fucking Thing
• CRI — Cranial-Rectal Insertion Or Cranial-Rectal Inversion (head-up-ass Syndrome)
• CROACC — Cannot Rule Out Anything, Correlate Clinically
• CRS — Can’t Remember Shit
• CRT — Can’t Really Treat
• CSD — Chronic Slapping Deficiency – Annoying/unruly Family Members Hitting Nurse’s Call Button Every 5 Minutes With Minor Requests/inane Questions Or For Fun
• CTD — Circling The Drain (Close To Death)
• CTF — Cletus The Fetus (US). A 23 Week, Or Earlier, Births That Parents Expect To Survive Against All Odds
• CTS — Cold-tea Sign / Cold Tea Syndrome – Refers To The Several Cups of Cold Tea On The Bedside Cabinet Beside A Dead Geriatric (i.e. No-one Noticed The Patient Had Died)
• CTS — Crazier Than Shit
• CYA — Cover Your Ass; Unnecessary Procedure/prescription Done To Avoid Being Sued
• D&D — Divorced And Desperate (middle Aged Female Who Visits Doctor Weekly Just For Male Attention)
• D&D — Death And Donuts (night Shift)
• DACB — (US) Drunk As Cooter Brown (UK Equivalent Is PAAF/PIAF)
• DBI — Dirt Bag Index: Number of Tattoos X Number of Missing Teeth = Days Since The Patient Last Bathed
• DENTIST — Doesn’t Even Need Treatment – It’s Sorted, Truly
• DF — Dude Factor – Survival Scoring Factor Based On Social Worth. A High Dude Factor = An Individual of Questionable Social Worth Who Survives Near-fatal Injuries. A Low Dude Factor = Professional Person Who Slips In The Bathroom Sustaining A Fatal Injury
• DFO — (US) Done Fell Out (anything From Fainting To Cardiac Arrest)
• DFO — Drunk And Fell Over
• DFO-SFJ — Done Fell Out – Screaming For Jesus
• DIDC — Dose of I Don’t Care – Pain-killing Meds That Make Patient Light-headed
• DIDR — Dose of I Don’t Remember – Pain-killing Meds That Leave Patient Without Memory of Painful Procedure
• DIFFC — Dropped In For Friendly Chat (i.e. No Medical Problem)
• DIIK — Darned If I Know
• DILF — Doctor I’d Like To F*** (Fornicate With): Nursing Slang For Good-looking Doctor
• DILLIGAF — Do I Look Like I Give A F*ck