Natural And Adoptive Siblings

The term ‘siblings’ refer to brothers and sisters. Parents, who have their biological child and want to adopt a second child, need to first prepare their own child for adoption much in advance. It is very important to prepare the older child for the arrival of a new child, in order to fight feelings of jealousy, sibling rivalry and loneliness. Sibling rivalry is a part of growing up. It means the competitive feelings and actions that often occur among children in a family. However, parents need not be stressed out to curtail the emotion as there are ways by which you can reduce sibling rivalry.

One of the key to avert sibling rivalry is that parents need to include their child in decision-making process for adoption. Many a times there are typical and intense sibling quarrels that may sometimes turn into revolting natural vs. adoptive children competition. While natural children claim to have more favors from you or expect closer bonds (because of their genetic ties), adoptive children look up to you and watch closely for your reactions. The latter might also feel scared, if you scold them. Rivalry between siblings is an extremely difficult situation for the parents to handle. However, we have provided below tips to reduce conflict between natural & adoptive children, just for you.

Tips To Reduce Conflict Between Natural & Adoptive Children

• Carefully considering the age of the child and the best time to bring in a new member to the family can reduce potential rivalries between siblings.

• It is very important to prepare the older sibling for a new role and make him/her feel like it is his/her own sibling.

• Make adoptive children understand that they hold a special place in your lives and that is why you brought them home in the first place.

• Understanding individuality and treating children as an individual is crucial. Help children understand that they have different privileges and responsibilities, because they are different individuals.

• Do not forget that all family members need a special place of their own. Respect each child’s space, toys, and time when he wants to be alone, away from his sibling. Parents can reduce rivalry by giving each child their protected turf.

• Avoid labeling or comparing one child to the other, or else it will lead them into competition.

• Always watch and note when siblings are not getting along and plan separate quiet activities for those times. It could be any time like before dinner, in the car, before bed, and so on.

• Analyze your behavior too and watch how you treat each child to see if you are contributing to the rivalry.

• Make sure you are not playing favorites.

• Always allow the older child ‘his/her space’, which shows your respect and interest in his feelings.

• Plan frequent family activities. This way you can enhance positive interactions among your children both natural and adoptive.

• Avoid games and contests in which one of the children ‘wins’ and the others ‘lose’ and always look out for activities and hobbies in which everyone ‘wins’, if they cooperate with one another.

• Parents must hold both the children responsible, when a conflict arises between them.

• Without taking anyone’s favor tell him or her you expect him or her to resolve the fight peacefully, without continuing to fight about it.

• Above all, parents need to spend time with each one of the children. Maintaining special connections with each child is essential Make each child feel special and important. Try to spend one-on-one time with each child every day.